The latest mule rumor, anything can happen... “An ordinary chronicle of a distorted truth”

“A muleteer stepped on the mule’s hoof, and the mule bit his ear.”

Stable Hand’s Report to the Instructor

“The muleteer stepped on the mule’s hoof, and the mule bit his ear.”

Conclusion: The muleteer is suffering and can no longer walk.

Instructor’s Report to the Rider

That idiot of a muleteer stepped on the brave mule’s hoof. The mule bit his ear, and rightly so.

The muleteer is suffering, and it serves his feet right. He can no longer walk, which is a good opportunity to forbid him from continuing his trekking trips.

Rider’s Report to the Farrier

According to the rider, there is a muleteer who is an idiot and whose feet are hurting after he stepped on the hoof of a kind and brave mule that had bitten him on the ear. According to the rider, the mule was in the right.

We share the rider’s opinion, as he is an authority in the world of mules. Even if one is bitten, that is no excuse for stepping on other people’s hooves. We are considering forbidding this muleteer from associating with mules.

Farrier’s Report to the Trainer

According to the rider, the instructor has become incoherent because a muleteer could no longer walk following an altercation with a mule. The instructor claims that Mario the mule was right, since it was the muleteer who challenged the mule by biting its ear.

The instructor wishes the muleteer to no longer be allowed to drive his mule. Upon reflection, such a decision could lead to a lawsuit, and that would be madness in the current social climate. The best solution would be to terminate the instructor’s contract.

Trainer’s Analysis for the Head Breeder

A rider has gone mad because, after pricking himself with a spur in the arena, he crushed the foot of a muleteer who had bitten his ear. The instructor claims the mule was right. Clearly, this instructor is an idiot, and the farrier is considering banning him from handling a mule.

However, experience has shown that idiots have never hindered the smooth functioning of a gathering of muleteers... Therefore, we clearly state that we believe it would be preferable to part ways with the rider.

Report from the Director General of the Stud Farm to the Minister of Agriculture

The head breeder informs me that a mule is responsible for serious unrest within the stud farm. The instructors are becoming more and more foolish; they bite each other’s ears while hopping on one foot and insist they are right against riders who have gone mad. The farrier crushed a muleteer, and the trainer claims that only idiots are capable of maintaining the proper functioning of the muleteers’ assembly.

We are considering proposing the early retirement of the latter.

To remember hospital administration — the beauty of public-sector human resources adapted to the animal world.

Mule qui peut, April 2026Jean Poitevin

“What people end up saying often matters more than what actually happened.”